I am sharing something deep about my life with you because this is a blog about my ups and downs, and this is one of my downs. It's embarassing to put this out there, but I just feel so down in the dumps right now.
To show you how cluttered and scatterbrained I am, I have to share with you that my gas was cut off this morning. I had no idea this was going ot happen. How do you not know? Don't you keep track of these things? How do you know that you didn't pay the bill? Didn't you get a notice?
Well, I did get a bill and I did get a notice that it would be cut off. Where were these notices? In a huge stack of paperwork on my desk. The envelopes were still sealed. I never even opened them. I put them in a too be read pile on my desk and then because my desk is so cluttered, I never opened them. I am so upset with myself right now. I am so worried about calling my hubby right now.
I feel like the world is against me. Or that I am against me. I have a gas stove. I have been really into cooking dinner for my family and because I was disoraganized and cluttered, I screwed myself up. I was really starting to enjoy something, and then I had to go and screw it up. I guess it was my reality check. Things aren't roses and puppy dogs. No matter how hard I try and change soemthing in my life, I am just reminded what a screw up I really am.
I am just in a really dark place right now. Instead of giving in and going to get something to eat to drown my sorrows, I am just going to go pay my bill and hope they can come tomorrow to turn it back on.
I will not let this happen again. It changes now.
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